


Off-the-record drabbles

by Nelja-in-English (Nelja)



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Body Horror, Drabble Collection, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Gen, Giant Spiders, M/M, Mild Sexual Content, Monster!Jon, Psychological Horror, Spiders, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Unhealthy Relationships, ghost!Sasha
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-28
Updated: 2019-03-09
Packaged: 2019-07-03 17:24:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 37
Words: 3,566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15823536
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nelja/pseuds/Nelja-in-English
Summary: Drabbles written for some writing challenges on tumblr. Multiple ships. Right know, creepy prompts about control (but there's not only this)35) Peter/Martin, “Undress. I have bought you new clothes.”36) Jared/Sebastian, "Why are you complaining? I'm doing what's best for you."37) Elias/Melanie, ”Do you remember what freedom feels like?”





	1. Daisy/Basira, Kiss

“Is it true?” Basira asks. “That I’m _the only person you care about_?”

Daisy stays silent. Too many secret parts of her heart have already been revealed today. 

Basira understands anyway. 

“I never knew.” she says softly. “I found you distant.” 

Daisy should protest. She wanted to protect Basira. She said nothing when she left the Police. It was not enough, as Basira sacrificed her freedom for her.

She hates everything about this place, about Bouchard. When Basira kisses her tentatively, bringing soaring happiness to her chest, she almost manages to forget it’s because of something he said.


	2. Jon/Martin, Loss

Jon can’t remember last time he cried.

“Don’t,” Martin says weakly. “Don’t cry.” He coughs blood. “Don’t leave me. Please.”

Jon won’t, cradling him, holding him too tight like it could keep him alive. Martin still tries to lean against him.

Jon feels furious. How dare they? He remembers Mary’s book, he thinks about cheating death. It hurt, being like this, Gerard had said. But Martin was meant to stay with him always, he would have wanted…

“Martin,” he asks, desperate. “Martin, if it was possible…”

But he’s already stopped breathing, and Jon is alone to decide now.


	3. Jon/Elias, Stay

"I will be reasonable, Jon. I will allow your ridiculous overprotectiveness of your assistants." Elias knows Jon feels the hanging threat.

"And in exchange?" 

"You will never leave me." There was probably some compulsion in Jon's words. Elias wanted to demand this, but less desperately.

"Obviously. I'm stuck here, as you know. We're mystically linked and everything. Until I die."

"You know what I mean. Promise." Elias grips Jon's arm, and thinks _Never betray me again. And I will make sure you won't die. Ever._

"I promise," Jon says. He looks afraid, so he probably understood.


	4. Jude/Agnes, Bite

Jude hates this guy - mediocre even by human standards, he's nothing - hates Agnes for kissing him, hates herself for never asking, if it was so simple.

He burned for it. It was too good for him.

Jude can no longer ask now, just bites into Agnes' lip, as strong as possible, drawing magma-like blood. It could destroy her. It would be good, falling to her anger.

Agnes looks at her calmly, thanks her in a polite, detached voice.

Jude's guts blaze again, and she understands that her God will make everything slower and most painful, just for her.


	5. Jon/Martin, Roam

“Don’t look!” Jon tells Martin, before realizing the irony, considering the God who claimed them. Who changed him this way.

His torn clothes reveal a body covered in magical eyes; Jon suddenly fears Martin’s horror towards his humanity lost.

But Martin comes closer, whispers. “That’s okay. It’s still you.” He timidly raises his hand, brushing Jon’s torso softly, between the eyes. Jon shivers in plseasure, and Martin becomes bolder, gently touching him all over.

With these eyes, Jon perceived so many magics and secrets. Weird he really sees Martin’s love for the first time.


	6. Sasha/Melanie, Tickle

It’s lonely being a ghost in Artefact Storage. Few people can see Sasha, and they are trained in pretending otherwise.

She cried and begged in front of Sonja, who didn’t recognize her. It was before Sasha understood what the monster did to her, and to everyone.

She still tries, always. 

Once Melanie King visits. She was a ghost hunter, she should feel her! Sasha concentrates to appear, starts to explain everything. 

Melanie’s eyes widen “Sasha?”

Sasha just goes through Melanie when she tries to hug her, and Melanie complains it tickles, as she laughs and she cries.


	7. Jon/Elias, Push

Jon has been watching Elias intensely these days. The good way, diving into his mind, deep down to his soul.

Elias should be wary. Every second of it makes him vibrate. 

_Keep doing this_ , he thinks. _You’ve more to see._

Jon smiles, like he heard - it’s what makes Elias snap and pin Jon against the wall.

Jon is fully pliant under his lips, registering the power he has over Elias, and Elias doesn’t even care. He shows him his true need, he gives him everything. 

Jon clings to him afterwards, trembling; Elias doesn’t regret a thing.


	8. Jon/Martin, Mourn

Martin stays home for three weeks. He welcomes the fever, the crippling nausea. The Eye let Jon die. It can devour him too. Then the weakness worsens, and Martin no longer controls the steps leading him to the Archives.

Elias is waiting for him, with a smile. Martin can barely understand when he is offered the Archivist job.

“You don’t have to, but you’d be honouring Jon’s memory.”

Martin shivers in dread, under Elias’ eager eyes.

He takes the offer. It’s still about destroying himself, and becoming almost what Jon was seems like the sweetest possible way.


	9. Jon/Elias, Bite

“With time, you will learn to just watch,” Elias said. “In the meantime, I can help with the anger.” 

Jon became angry at him instead. Of course, Elias expected it, enjoyed it when Jon grabbed him, slammed him against the wall, leaving bruises on his skin, scratching and biting. 

Now Jon is panting, the fury mostly gone, and looks at the dark red marks he left on Elias’ neck. He remembers, _you’re human, you can still bleed_.

He smirks bitterly, thinking it’s his human part that hurt Elias. He wonders which part of Elias let himself be hurt.


	10. Martin & Mr Spider, Hush

“I don’t want to hurt him,” Martin repeats. “He can hate me, that’s okay, I betrayed him, but he must be safe.”

A giant, hairy leg brushes his cheek. “You won’t kill him, just stop him, just change him.”

Martin knew, but it still hurts.

“You said the _real_ Jon wouldn’t trigger the Watcher’s Crown,” the spider says. “So he’s already lost to you. Isn’t it worth it, being ours, to save the world from him?”

“Why are you being nice?” Martin asks, choking. 

“Because you’re one of us now,” it softly answers.


	11. Jon/Elias, Sleep

Actually, Elias wouldn’t need to go downstairs to see Jon sleeping, drooling a bit on his desk. To gaze at his face so peaceful first, then wracked by nightmares.

He softly moves one lock of grey hair out of Jon’s forehead; he could stay in his office and still see the dark eyelids behind, see his panicked eyes through them, without being here, without ever touching him.

There would be no risk Jon would wake up, get angry, and question his motives; it’s probably why Elias is here now, fearing and hoping his Archivist will feel his presence and look.


	12. Peter/Elias, Birthday

The new Head of the Magnus Institute sends Peter a birthday postcard. 

It’s a display of power - of course he knows - gesture of provocation - he also knows it’s not done in Peter’s family - and still very polite, though everything but sweet. 

So Peter acts in return, goes to the Institute, finds Elias Bouchard, and “invites” him to his dimension. The scary Archivist will do without him for a day.

“You don’t have to take me on a date for a card,” Elias jokes, hiding his fear. Peter is almost tempted to let him go for this, but doesn’t.


	13. Melanie/Georgie, Tickle

“He loves you.” Georgie says, smiling.

Melanie loves cats too, they’re pretty and fierce, but the Admiral’s abnormally fluffy tail gets in her neck, then under her nose, and wiggles; and it becomes hard to stop squirming.

“Oh god, you’re ticklish!” Georgie says with delight, and starts to poke her in the ribs. “This is such blackmail material!”

“Confess: your cat is a super-spy in your pay!” Melanie enunciates with difficulty. Then she bursts out laughing, before catching her breath. “But you don’t win, pretty girl. Soon I’ll find out your terrible secret too. Just wait.”


	14. Jon/Gerard Keay, Kiss

Jon has been listening to Gerry’s recording more than it’s healthy.

Every time he tries to convince himself to burn the skin page. He will never summon Gerry again. So it changes nothing. He couldn’t bear the look of disappointment and anger on his face. There’s knowledge here, but knowledge he can’t have (he will never use compulsion against him, never. That’s one of the reasons he should destroy it now. He doesn’t trust himself.)

He kisses the skin softly while listening to Gerry’s voice, and postpones the burning once again.


	15. Jon/Martin, Kiss

“I’m bad at relationships,” Jon explains. “I forget important things. I…” He realizes Martin knows everything about how callous he can be, how oblivious, and still loves him. 

Martin couldn’t be more wrong. The worst is, Jon doesn’t hate it. 

“I don’t do sex,” he says again. “Never. It won’t change.” 

Martin doesn’t even look disappointed, only incredibly hopeful. Jon hasn’t said no yet. He should. But he wants this. He wants to try. To see Martin happy. 

“You could kiss me, though. If you want to. I’d love that.” 

(Martin very much wants to.)


	16. Jon/Elias, Undress

“I’ll show you,” Elias says, and before Jon can accept or protest, he’s already removing his clothes. 

Jon wants to look away, but can’t. He sees the eyes Elias has mentioned, engraved deep into his pale skin, he registers their shape and the way they seem to look back at him. But he also sees Elias’ confident posture and provocative gaze. His hopes of it being just Beholding magic don’t last long when he sees Elias’ half-hard cock.

He still stares at the exposed body, he can’t stop seeing, memorising, understanding, and Elias just smiles.


	17. Melanie/Julia, Stop

“You weren’t here.” Julia Montauk says. “It was mercy killing.”

Melanie knows. Elias made sure of it. But this woman still killed her father, and the anger in her asks for blood.

“Besides,” Julia says with a cold assurance, “you would lose. You’re strong but I have a friend.”

Melanie wants - needs - to kill her even more. (She had friends once.) 

“ _If_ you plan to go against Amherst, though, we have a better chance together.”

Melanie stares. She is, surprisingly, tempted. She believes Julia wouldn’t kill her while she sleeps. 

She can’t trust the reverse, though.


	18. Jon/Martin, Cute

“Not my business I guess,” Tim doesn’t pretend it makes a difference, “but you shouldn’t let Jon treat you like this.”

“I don’t mind,” Martin answers automatically.

Jon’s disappointment is harsh, but it means he noticed him, maybe even he expected him to do well… 

“At least, when he says I did okay, I know he means it?” Martin tries too hard to convince Tim, he knows. “That makes me happy. He seems almost surprised. It’s cute actually.”

“You need to get laid,” Tim mutters. “Not by him,” he adds; not like it is an option anyway.


	19. Jon/Elias, Grab

They all hate Elias; he doesn’t mind. Even Jon, he tells himself. But he can’t let this shared dislike unite them.

So he invades their little reunion, ignores the whispers, just grabs Jon by the collar and kisses him hard.

Jon doesn’t even fight, paralyzed by shock, just feels and learns, as he’s meant to.

Elias delights in Tim’s disgust and Melanie’s anger, Martin’s aching jealousy and Basira’s half-shameful amusement, these uneasy feelings pulling them apart, isolating Jon more. 

He enjoys Jon’s lips even more; that part is a secret.


	20. Gertrude/Nikola, Realize

Gertrude Robinson has been dead for two years, and she has better skin than Jonathan Sims. 

Less scars, and the wrinkles only make the skin softer, easier to tear off. The body is not even rotten, thanks to spells against the Corruption. Well, nothing protects her from Nikola.

Wearing her half-faded memories is delightful - this woman hurt so many people. Nikola will only give her more opportunities. She owes Gertrude this, making her last plan dramatically fail.

She almost regrets not meeting her alive, not making her scream.

Well, she still has her voice, if she wants to play pretend.


	21. Jon/Elias, Stop

“It’s you!” Jon viciously accuses, trembling. “You made me like this.” 

Elias sees Jon’s right hand, the former blisters turned into dozens of tiny seeing eyes. He can only imagine every scar opening into new tributes to the Beholding, under his scarf, on his whole body… 

“You overestimate my power in this,” he answers, throat dry, shivering with want.

Elias leads Jon’s holy hand to his face, even fearing he will get strangled.

But Jon’s Sight is stronger than his fury - he understands he did this to himself, and Elias holds him while he breaks.


	22. Jon/Martin, Stay

“Please don’t go!” Martin pleads, panicked. “It’s too late. Jane Prentiss is out there. Stay. It’s your bed, after all. If something happened to you because I took it, I would never forgive myself. Sleep here.” 

“And you?” Jon groans. 

“I don’t need sleep!” Martin spurts. Jon eyes him suspiciously. “I mean, not now, not as much as you do.” 

Jon nods, and Martin’s heart flutters. He stays by the bed that night, fighting sleep, a fire extinguisher in his arms.

Next night, falling asleep in a bed that smells like Jon, Martin almost cries.


	23. Jon and the assistants, Guardian

Jon has been terrible to all his assistants. Except for Sasha. He didn’t have the time. She died first.

Maybe that’s why he’s so odious to the others. A superstitious fear it will end just as badly. Or maybe he’s making excuses, as he’s losing his humanity.

He doesn’t need them to understand, only to live. Even apart from him. Especially apart from him. From the risk he could sacrifice any of them. 

He tries to protect them from other monsters, too. But the only one he controls, even a little, is right here.


	24. Martin/Mike Crew, Bite

“I could bite you,” Mike whispers, slowly licking Martin’s neck. “Mark you. Even your Archivist would see it. Would you like that?”

Martin, shivering, tries to gather enough brain to answer.

“You mean, for you, or…”

He can’t express the alternative he sees in Mike’s too-blue eyes. Losing himself, getting a measure of power against deep tunnels, dark basements, and everything horrible.

“It can go both ways,” Mike laughs, distant, almost scary. 

Martin has his god, and it’s not Mike’s. He takes the mark though, a human-like mark. It’s good to pretend sometimes.


	25. Jon/Elias, Important

“Anyway, I’m just a tool to you,” Jon mutters, “A conduit to your Beholding.”

He looks annoyed about it. Elias loves it.

“You are close to the Eye,” he confirms. “You already were, before I made you the Archivist. Don’t you see: I met you, brilliant and obstinate, ready to do anything for knowledge and understanding of the world. I saw the real you, and thought you were only missing power to be like the God I worship. And you reproach me for not caring?”

Jon blushes, in confusion, anger, guilt, and a pride that Elias delights in.


	26. Martin/Adelard Dekker, Roam

“You have spiders under your skin, kid. But you’re not filled with them. That’s… unusual.”

Martin is fully confused. After an old, surprisingly strong man tackled him and started to feel his body quite embarrassingly, he expected more horrifying things. Or less. Not this anyway. 

“Is it bad?” _Will you kill me for this?_ would probably be a less stupid question. 

“Depends. Who do you serve?” 

“I work with the Archivist!” 

“Then yes.” 

“Can you help me?”

“Teach you to control the spiders, not the other way?” He seems to think about it, and Martin can almost hope.


	27. Peter/Martin, "of course I care"

“So many threats outside, that could follow you home…”

Peter offering his house to Martin - he is isolating him again! It isn’t… it shouldn’t remind him of Jon. But Martin needs the sleep…

And when Peter joins him between the silk sheets, he surrenders again. He moans and forgets to pretend this new intimacy is nothing.

Obviously, Martin wakes up alone in the huge, luxurious, empty house. Only a message with the princely breakfast: Practice; wait for me. You’re safe here. 

Martin readies himself to _practice being lonely_ , shivers, and tries not to think about months or years.


	28. Sasha/Michael, "anything in the world"

“What do you wish for, my dear? Anything in the world?” 

Sasha shivers. She remembers asking about seeing her friends and the monster… ate Tim and Martin… and Sasha couldn’t help or be seen. And the time she wished for being useful, and it made her ‘help’ with this poor woman.

She remembers fake flowers, tasteless but bitter fruit, distorted cats and wrong spiraled waves on an artificial sea. 

The monster saved her life, and… maybe it plays with her on purpose. Maybe it’s inhuman enough, and doesn’t.

“Just hold me,” she asks, not daring to wish for anything real.


	29. Annabelle/Emily "you deserve a present"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Emily is my OFC in the fic "Through love and terror".

“I hate when they complain and cry,” Annabelle explains, her head on Emily’s lap. “I have to make them stop, they spoil everything.”

Emily makes a sympathetic noise, as Annabelle observes her. “You’re different. You deserve a present for this.” She takes Emily’s hand, sucks at her wrist, making her gasp.

It’s a silk bracelet, a spider in her web.“Do you like it?” Annabelle asks, almost anxiously. “I have no idea what you like, except me. Or do I need to make you?”

“I love it,” Emily answers, somehow scared, because it’s true.


	30. Jon/Martin, "what's best for you"

Martin tries to avoid Jon, really, and when Jon corners him and grabs his wrist, he attempts to disappear like Peter taught him.

But Jon kisses his hand - and warmth bubbles under Martin’s skin, flows in his veins like a spring.

“Don’t,” he begs, as Jon is now desperately kissing his neck.

“I want to save you,“ Jon whispers. Does he also _want_ to kiss Martin or is the Eye giving him instructions? Martin feels both horrified and elated, as the Lonely power in his soul slowly dissolves into nothing.

“I don’t belong to you,” he bitterly lies.


	31. Nikola/Jon, "undress"

“Undress. I have bought you new clothes,” Nikola orders. “I won’t get you out of your skin yet, if you behave, but it’s second choice.”

The Archivist rudely tries to justify though his gag why being tied to a chair is an inconvenience for this; merciful, Nikola lets him squirm on the floor instead, hands still tied, out of his clothes. The postures he has to go through are delightfully unnatural. 

She has a brand new harlequin costume for him, but she hopes he protests, finds it ridiculous - so she has an excuse to keep him naked longer.


	32. Mr Spider/Martin, "what's best for you"

“Please don’t,” Martin begs.

Every delightful bite of the spider creature puts a new spider under his skin. “It’s for your own good. The Lonely will no longer touch you.”

This is terrifying, just as Peter was. But unlike the Lonely, this comes with some elation as well. Martin has a goal, something to do. Now he has spiders in his blood. Friends. Pets. Children. Lovers - he didn’t want to think this, but they feel so good.

Jon will hate this, he thinks. Well, Martin had lost every hope of seeing him again, and this is not worse.


	33. Jon/Elias, "think in my voice"

Jon is panting, after Elias puts the details of the ritual in his head. Worn out, but so much stronger, abandoning his puny hopes for a greater one. The inevitability of the Watcher’s Crown carved into his mind, his very being.

“How does it feel to think in my voice,” Elias teases, petting his hair.

Jon glares at Elias. “Touch me again, and I’ll devour the whole of you. Everything you are will become my knowledge, and my head will be the only place your voice will ever be heard again.”

Elias shudders, and tries not to moan.


	34. Jon/Martin, "you deserve a present"

Long ago, Martin would tell Jon off when he was wrong. Jon stopped listening. Jon thinks he knows everything. Maybe he does, but he can still be very wrong.

Martin should leave, should rebel. But Jon - Jon might be a monster, but he needs someone, he clings to Martin at nights, and he has never hurt _him_.

And sometimes, Jon rewards him with a present. A caress on his hair or poetry from other worlds. The memory of Sasha’s face or a kiss on the lips.

Always the best thing in the world, and it always leaves Martin crying.


	35. Peter/Martin, "undress"

When Peter orders Martin to undress, he blushes and thinks about getting fucked on Peter’s desk. Peter made it clear Martin was his. He’s almost embarrassed when he only has to put on new, more expensive clothes.

In the mirror, he sees a man who’s not him, so distant and cold. He tries to smile and it looks fake.

Are there magical clothes, he asks. Peter smiles, doesn’t answer.

Martin almost regrets Peter didn’t need to touch him to claim ownership. The fabric is soft against his skin and it’s all he will ever have.


	36. Jared/Sebastian, "what's best for you"

Sebastian should be dead. But Jared keeps pulling out his bones - it keeps hurting, sharply - before he puts a different bone in his body instead - a human bone.

"Stop... stop... stop..." Sebastian whispers, a litany of horror. 

"I'm making your body better. Stronger. Nicer looking. Don't complain," Jared answers, with a perverse laugh. 

"What did you?" Sebastian panics. "What do I..."

"You always claimed your mind was the important part of you. But you were wrong, and who will recognize you now?" 

It's the exact cheerfulness Sebastian learnt to fear, usually a day ruined, now his whole life.


	37. Elias/Melanie, "what freedom feels like"

Melanie has nightmares about Elias almost every night.

He comes too close, whispers into her ear. “You think I’m the prisoner; only because you don’t remember what freedom feels like, do you?”

He even strokes her hair, deceptively tender, and she _can’t move_. “Poor small creature, trapped by a god that’s not yours.”

It’s Elias, she knows. Not her own nightmares. _He_ ’s doing this to her. She’ll confirm it by sinking a knife in his throat, making it stop, and then he’ll know all about being offered to _a god that’s not his_.


End file.
